'It was soul-destroying' - bereaved parents facing postcode lottery during baby loss
Not every hospital provides the same standard of facilities for families experiencing a miscarriage, stillbirth or neo-natal death.
Last updated 11th Oct 2022
A leading charity is warning women who experience baby loss don't always receive the same level of care, depending on where they live.
This week we're shining a light on the hidden heartbreak of women and families who suffer miscarriage, stillbirth and neo-natal death.
According to Sands, 97% of UK hospital trusts say they have dedicated bereavement suites on site, where families can be looked after during their darkest times.
Bereavement suites
Hospitals which have invested in these spaces can offer care away from busy maternity wards, and allow families to engage with bereavement teams and take part in memory-making activities like taking photos or making hand/foot prints.
But Sands says although the situation is improving, there are still hospitals that aren't able to offer the best available care pathway.
This means some bereavement rooms are not soundproofed, so families can often hear the noise of a busy labour ward while they are grieving the loss of a child, while others share entrance, corridor and lift space with other maternity patients.
READ: Baby Loss Awareness Week: The stories
Some hospitals don't have facilities where family members and partners can stay.
Louise Caldwell, from East Kilbride, had to give birth in University Hospital Wishaw, that, at the time, had no dedicated space for women who'd suffered miscarriage.
She told us: "I was completely traumatised form the get-go, I was completely frozen in fear by those words 'the labour ward.'
"I assumed there were stand alone clinics, I went my whole life assuming that, so it was a shock when the hospital staff said 'You'll have to deliver in the Labour ward.'"
"It felt like I was being paraded, like 'this is what you could have won'"
Louise continued: "It felt like I was being paraded in a 'this is what you could have won' scenario and I hate that feeling that's with me, I can't shake that feeling, I can't help but feel dirty with that feeling."
Gary Denham's wife, Heather, also had to deliver their daughter, Jorgia, in a labour ward after she passed away at 20 weeks.
He's told us that experience will always stay with them: "To be faced with us sitting with a baby who would never cry, and to hear other people having healthy babies, it was soul-destroying."
Bereavement rooms offering support and care
Marc Harder from Baby Loss charity Sands says getting care right from the start can make a massive difference.
He told us: "While excellent bereavement care can't bring that baby back it can perhaps make the first part of the bereavement journey a little more manageable than it otherwise might have been.
"I would never say makes it easier, as it's never an easy journey."
Speaking about the benefits of dedicated bereavement spaces, he told us: "These are spaces that are airy, that are light, that are away from the busy labour ward and are accessible.
"They're a special space for mother and partner and family to spend time with their baby and create memories, and if its well furnished, tastefully decorated, soundproofed, with an ensuite and a sofa bed for the partner to stay overnight, these can be incredible sanctuaries for families in the midst of their grief."
What's currently available
The first specialist miscarriage delivery unit in Scotland is currently being developed at University Hospital Wishaw, and is expected to open from the end of October, following Louise's campaign.
READ MORE: Specialist miscarriage delivery units to be introduced in Wishaw after campaign by East Kilbride mum
Senior midwife Leah Noble told us: “Recognising the importance of privacy and grieving in a quiet and protected space, we are moving towards a model where all women who suffer pregnancy loss will be cared for in our O’Hana suite, which will be a soundproofed suite away from the labour ward.
"Future plans will include utilising two other rooms within this area where women will have the choice for them and their families to spend their full journey without the need to go to a labour ward.
"All care will be provided in this area which will be entered through the early pregnancy assessment unit.
“We have engaged with our internal contractors on soundproofing the area to ensure that these areas are equipped for clinical care. Our completion date has been set for the end of October to allow the work to be carried out.”
A spokesperson from NHS Greater Glasgow and Clyde said: "We have had the rooms in labour suite at the Princess Royal and Royal Alexandra Hospital where women who are experiencing a loss are cared for upgraded and refurbished with the help of funding from a great charity SIMBA.
"We are now moving to upgrade the rooms in Queen Elizabeth - this means that parents can stay in the room in comfort together, with access to tea and coffee in a more homely environment.
"Absolutely, there is always more we can do.
"We are currently in the planning stages of setting up a new team of bereavement midwives to lead improvements and training for all staff.
"We are working to ensure that we embed and implement the Scottish national maternity bereavement pathway recommendations fully."
We'll have more Baby Loss Awareness Week coverage on Tay FM throughout the week.