Cheshire woman warns romance fraud can happen to anyone

It's as a new report shows almost £7-million was lost in these scams in the last year.

Romance Fraud
Author: Adam SmithPublished 2nd Oct 2024

A Cheshire woman who was conned out of £50,000 in an online dating scam is warning others it can happen to anyone at anytime.

New figures suggest more than £3.8 million was reported as stolen in romance scams in the past six months, marking a 27% jump compared with the previous half-year period.

The average loss to romance fraudsters was £4,500 with victims aged 18-93 being affected.

Lyn from Warrington, who is in her 60’s, was tricked by a man she met online called “Derek”.

"We got talking. He was a widow and I thought oh we've got something in common." said Lyn.

"Four months in to the relationship there was this accident. Then he had all these hospital bills he said he had to pay, and asked if I would help him. He said he'd pay all the money back with interest."

The two engaged in an online relationship in 2020 and never met in person, with Derek telling Lyn that he had recently moved from Manchester to Dubai where he owned a mineral company. To aid in the sham, the scammer had taken and edited pictures from the internet to manipulate Lyn into thinking that he, and the relationship, was genuine.

Lyn said: "They keep promising to come over and meet up and you keep sending the money out. These romance scammers look for vulnerable people. These people are clever, they can do it to males or females. They're just there to get your money."

"They know what to ask, they kind of reel you in"

New data in a report by the bank Santander highlights how customers lost £6,826,748 to romance scams in the 12 months running from August 2023 to August 2024.

Some £3,813,410 was lost between March and August this year.

Half (50%) of people have received unsolicited online romantic or flirtatious messages, which they suspected or have confirmed to be a scam, according to an Opinium survey of 2,000 people for Santander in July.

Nearly a third (29%) said they would offer financial help to a romantic partner they have known for less than six months.

But nearly two-thirds (65%) of people believe they would never become a victim of romance fraud.

Peter Staffell, a behavioural expert at Santander UK, said: "Scammers are experts at presenting themselves as someone you can trust, someone who 'gets' you.

"They play the long game, building a relationship before executing on their scam and, as our research shows, it's a natural instinct for many of us to willingly lend a financial hand to someone who we have formed an emotional bond with.

"Then they've gone. The scam is complete, and the impact extends far beyond the financial losses, leaving emotional scars and often people feeling more isolated than before.

"You can take control though, a few simple checks when you first start to speak to someone, and before your emotions take hold, can reveal a lot about the person you're speaking to and save heartache further down the line."

Paul Gorton from Manchester, a former contestant on BBC's The Traitors, said: "In my experience, it's surprisingly easy to build deep trust, especially when someone is charming and says all the right things.

"As we start to feel a connection, whether it's real or not, we can end up overlooking red flags and ignore any warnings from others around us.

"Stay vigilant to spot a traitor, it'd be too easy if they simply messaged you out of the blue asking for your money. Approach any new relationship with cautious optimism, complete checks and having your wits about you at the start."

Here are some tips from Santander to stay protected from romance and friendship scams:

  1. Try to remove emotion from your decision-making. Be really careful if you are lending or giving someone money. No matter how urgent their reason might seem, it is important you think it through. Consider discussing it with a trusted friend or family member first.
  1. Pictures can be edited and fake profiles can easily be made. Performing a reverse image search online can show whether the photos have been taken from another website or social media platform.
  1. It could be a red flag if the person you have been talking to online will not video call or meet you in person. Fraudsters will make excuses about why this cannot happen or change plans to do so at the last minute.
  1. Never send money or give card details, online account details, or copies of important personal documents to anyone you have only met online.

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