Childline sees surge in children struggling with loneliness

The Charity have launched a ‘Day in the Lonely’ campaign in response

Author: Cameron GreenPublished 28th Feb 2023

New data from Childline has revealed that the service is contacted an average of 15 times a day by children who are struggling with loneliness.

The counselling service run by the NSPCC had 5,564 counselling sessions with children regarding this issue between April 2021 and March 2022. To combat this issue, Childline has launched a campaign called 'Day in the Lonely', with the support of Lidl GB, which aims to let children know that their feelings of loneliness do not have to last.

The charity is urging young people and their parents to speak about mental health issues early on, to prevent it from escalating to a crisis point.

The increase in calls from under 11s seeking support for loneliness has risen by 71% compared to 2017/2018 figures. Poor mental health is a significant concern for children contacting Childline, with poor mental health being the top concern for the past six years.

A Childline counsellor recently spoke to a 10-year-old girl who feels lonely due to having no friends at school, and the girl had not spoken to her parents as she did not think they would take it seriously.

The ‘Day in the Lonely’ campaign... includes three videos based on real Childline calls, showing the different ways young people experience loneliness. Childline's trained counsellors hear from lonely children who feel left out of friendship groups, while others say their loneliness stems from feeling negatively about themselves or feeling misunderstood by their friends or family. The national lockdown due to the coronavirus pandemic compounded feelings of loneliness, with counselling sessions on loneliness peaking during April 2020 to March 2021.

Despite a slight drop in counselling sessions regarding loneliness since moving out of the pandemic, the number of children needing support remains high. Childline's campaign aims to encourage young people and their parents to speak out about their feelings and to let them know that they are not alone.

Helen Westermann is the Charity's head of campaigns, she's been speaking to us.

"It could be that children are left out of friendship groups. It could be that they're left out of social media chats. We know that loneliness can have an impact on and children's mental health and and wellbeing. They feel like nobody else is in that position. They feel like they're alone. They can't see a way out of it. And I think by talking to our ChildLine counsellors, they are given that hope for the future. We do talk to them about this being a passing time in their lives. Look at ways to cope and look at other sources of help and support within that child's life".

What can parents do to help?

"It's really tough for parents, isn't it? If they've got a child that they they think is lonely, or the child indeed discloses that they're feeling lonely, that can be really difficult to hear as a parent. And I think the first piece of advice would be to let your child know that you're there for them, reassure them that you are on this on their side. You are taking this seriously and they can come and talk to you about anything. There's some children having that face to face. Conversation can be really difficult.

What if that isn't working?

"So it sounds odd, but sometimes messaging them or via social media can be a way for a parent to have a more tricky conversation with their child that they the child might be reluctant to have face to face, and I think it's about staying calm and remaining approachable. The the parent may feel that the child isn't helping themselves or they're displaying behaviour that isn't particularly helpful, but it's really important that child has a space and that trusted adult to talk through what's going on for them and then encouraging them, perhaps to do things with you so you know, spending some time with them"

"Planning some activities and if it's not you, who else could that child talk to? So if it's not mum or dad or whoever's at home, sign post them to to ChildLine. We've got some great advice on our message boards by young people for young people. And that's a really nice place for young people who are experiencing loneliness to go and get a bit of help and support from their peer group".

And if you're not a parent, but are still worried?

"I think it's recognizing that when a child doesn't seem themselves, a child might be particularly withdrawal, and they're not engaged in their the usual kind of social activities. They may seem quieter than usual. They may be avoiding tech or spending longer periods of time on on tech things that are just a little bit out of character. And I guess if you're a sports coach or or working in a a youth organization, you know, you might want to spot when something doesn't seem quite right for that child or young person".

"Just leave the door metaphorically open for them to come and have a chat with you. If things aren't feeling too good for them right now. And it's about reassuring them that things can and will get better with the right help and support. And if a child really struggling, that's then the conversation, perhaps with a medical professional involved in the child's life".

Any advice for children who are experiencing loneliness?

I would just sign post children and young people to our ChildLine sites or the number 08 hundred 1111. There's some great information and advice on the ChildLine web pages. I mentioned our message boards but we also have a place called calm zone where children are feeling really stressed. Quite anxious about loneliness or other issues in their lives. They can go get some help when breathing exercises and and just have some activities to help them reduce that stress and anxiety within their lives".

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