"Love isn't enough, love doesn't save them" - mum demands change after daughter's suicide at university
Hilary Grime is now campaigning to stop other families going through the same experience
Last updated 7th Nov 2022
A bereaved mum has joined a campaign calling for universities to have a legal duty of care for their students, after her daughter died while away studying.
Phoebe Grime, from Kent, moved to Newcastle University in 2019 to study philosophy.
She took her own life on the 5th June 2021.
Phoebe had been receiving counselling, but her mum Hilary believes it was not sufficient to deal with the difficulties her daughter was dealing with.
A coroner ruled nothing more could have been done on the university's part. You can read their statement in full below.
Calls for a change in the law
Hilary Grime is now calling for a change in the law so that all universities have a legal duty of care to their students - something she believes will help improve services, accountability and ultimately save lives.
She told us: "We are trusting these universities with our children, and they are professing that they are on it with safety and wellbeing, but they don't have proper frameworks and benchmarks in place.
"It's unbelievable that this whole sector doesn't have a duty of care. They can say they have safety and wellbeing (policies) but unless it's legal it's not really good enough."
"Not all universities are doing the same thing it just needs to be clear, they need to be accountable for it. One student takes their life every four of five days. It's desperate."
Online petition launched
Phoebe was an active student before lockdown meant she was confined to her accommodation. Previously she'd partaken in sports like ice hockey.
After her death, it emerged she'd spoken about her wellbeing concerns on an Instagram page she shared with her friends. She'd also discussed these feeling with counsellors.
Mum Hilary told our Mental Health Monday Podcast: "I could say my life is ruined.
"But its also hugely effected everyone in my family, Phoebe's friends, my friends, the repercussions of this are huge and its really urgent"
An online petition calling for a legal of duty of care to be introduced for universities towards their students is now live on the government's e-petition page
You can listen to Hilary's story on this week's Mental Health Monday Podcast.
Newcastle University statement
We approached Newcastle University for a response, and they provided this statement from Academic Registrar Lucy Backhurst:
“We are devastated by Phoebe’s death and I would like to once again offer my sincere condolences to her family and friends.
“Phoebe was a talented and popular student who had great potential and she will be remembered fondly by all those who had the pleasure of knowing her during her time at Newcastle University.
“In the 18 months she studied with us, Phoebe received ongoing help and we had been working hard to support her through her studies.
“A support plan was in place to help her with her academic studies, and she had a dedicated counsellor who was helping her during a very difficult time.
“While the coroner in Phoebe's inquest found nothing more could have been done to help her, we are never complacent and continuously work to improve the services and support we provide students and have been looking again at our policies and processes.
“Like all schools, colleges and universities, we are acutely aware of the increasing number of young people needing mental health support.
“Working with key partners, we do our very best to support any student who is struggling with their mental health and offer a range of support options to meet the many different needs. "
Universities given new guidance on student mental health
Universities UK has told us uni's need to have clearer policies on how and when they should involve family, carers and trusted friends when there is considered to be a serious risk to the welfare of a student.
They say they have worked with suicide prevention charity PAPYRUS in calling on universities to be more proactive in preventing student suicides.
In particular, the new guidance sets out how and when universities should involve families, carers and trusted others when there are serious concerns about the safety or mental health of a student.
These recommendations include:
- Making it mandatory for students to give a trusted contact at registration
- Having regular check-ins for students to update this information
- Ensuring universities review their suicide prevention plans
- Making it clear a trusted contact maybe be contacted if there are serious concerns about a student's safety
Professor Steve West CBE, President of Universities UK and Vice-Chancellor of UWE Bristol, said:
“There is nothing more devastating for a university community than a student death by suicide. As a sector, we need to do everything we can to reduce the risk of suicide and serious self-harm.
“Universities are committed to putting students who may be in difficulty at the centre of decisions about their care – including who they want involved. But this commitment must be balanced with a duty to protect a student when there are serious concerns about their safety and welfare.
“Universities can help save lives when they adopt a proactive response to suicide prevention, and an important part of that proactive response is making proportionate, risk-based decisions around involving trusted contacts.”