Romance scam costs North Yorkshire woman £85,000
She is sharing her story to help others
A North Yorkshire woman has shared her devastating experience of falling victim to a romance fraud scam — losing over £85,000. Her story is part of a national campaign to raise awareness of this manipulative and increasingly common crime.
After the end of a 14-year marriage, she stepped into the world of online dating. Encouraged by friends and family, she created a profile — unsure how to "sell herself" or navigate the digital landscape of modern romance.
“After a few days, I began to receive messages... Then came the one profile to say hello. A handsome man who spoke with kindness... I said hello. I could never have imagined five letters could do so much harm.”
Over the following weeks, they exchanged messages and phone calls — no video chats, which didn’t feel unusual at the time. He claimed to be a wealthy businessman, lived nearby, and knew specific local details, all of which built her trust.
“He was always forthcoming... He explained he lived close by, mentioned areas I knew, talked about his bond with his mum — it all felt so genuine.”
Three weeks in, he said he was travelling for work. Before leaving, he told her he was falling in love.
“I was taken aback... I didn’t reply, but I was smitten.”
Then came the turning point: a phone call saying he had been mugged and hospitalised, followed by photos — which she later discovered were fake.
“I wanted to help him but couldn’t. Needless to say, I would find myself helping him from this moment on with all my money and more.”
He pressured her emotionally and financially, isolating her from family and friends, and using guilt and love to manipulate her.
“He would reply with such love and gratitude... then blame me for his loss of business. Shouting at me. Making me feel like it was my fault.”
She became emotionally exhausted, stopped eating properly, drank more, and withdrew into herself — a cycle she calls the “manipulation bubble.”
It was her sister who eventually uncovered the truth.
“She was a dog with a bone, and I thank her for that every day... My family saved me from a black hole. I was hanging on by a thread.”
North Yorkshire police have thanked the woman for sharing her story. The force say: 'Romance fraudsters are manipulative, patient, and often incredibly convincing. They know exactly what to say and do to gain your trust, and by the time alarm bells start to ring, many victims are already emotionally and financially invested.
If something doesn’t feel right, please trust your instincts. Stop and speak to someone you trust.'