Harrogate dad whose son took his own life urging people to not be afraid to talk about suicide
Steve Phillip’s son, Jordan, died by suicide in December 2019
A dad from Harrogate who lost his son to suicide is hoping his story will encourage people to be more open about their mental health.
It's as people worry if you talk to someone about whether they are feeling suicidal it might influence them to take their own life.
Steve Phillip’s son, Jordan, was just 34 years old when he died. He had been struggling with his mental health for a number of years.
He had been diagnosed clinically depressed in 2015 and had a number of episodes of depression over a several years.
For World Suicide Prevention Day (10 September), Steve is sharing Jordan's story to show how people who seem fine can be struggling, as he had a stable job, lots of friends, a girlfriend and loving family.
He said: "Most of the time he would manage his depression which came on in episodes but in other respects he was normal. He had a good job, he had a girlfriend, a house and a fantastic group of friends.
"He was the life and soul of the party and lit up the room when he walked in and yet he had this real struggle and he told us that he never looked forward to anything."
But Steve has said how "hindsight is a wonderful thing" and how he wished he'd asked his son more often how he was coping.
He said: "When we did get together you kind of want it to be a nice time and not always a sit down talk about mental health. I reflect on that now and I think about times I should've had that conversation but at the time I didn't know how to have that conversation.
"In the first year, you still don't accept it and don't accept that it's happened. You think he's going to call or he's going to turn up one day but he won't."
In the hours leading up to Jordan taking his own life, Steve was delivering a social media training workshop in Solihull which was three-hour drive home in heavy traffic.
The pair had suggested that they speak later that day, but after arriving the hotel room later that evening, they decided we’d catch up another time as it was late and Jordan was tired.
The following day Jordan died.
Steve received a call from Jordan's girlfriend, Charlotte, who found him. With the help of a neighbour, they smashed the front window of Jordan's house to get in.
He added: "I got the call from Jordan's girlfriend, Charlotte and she just kept saying 'I'm so sorry, Jordan's killed himself' and my world just went into a spiral.
"I had to drive home and the final part of that journey when I was coming off at Wetherby and turning into Harrogate I just wanted to keep on driving because I didn't want to face what I was going to have to face when I got back to the house."
Following Jordan's death, Steve soon established The Jordan Legacy CIC, to provide support to those struggling with their mental health or considering suicide, whilst simultaneously accepting the position as Head of Mission, at Champion Health UK Ltd, a rapidly growing tech company in the world of workplace employee wellbeing strategies.
He hopes the group will help achieve a desired state where deaths by suicide are rare events, by implementing practical actions to make communities and workplaces mentally healthy and psychologically safe places, so when instances are highlighted intervention can happen immediately.
You can read more about The Jordan Legacy here.
If you or anyone you know is struggling with their mental health or contemplating suicide you can find out more information from the NHS here.