Stroke survivor from Cornwall encourages others to ask for emotional support
Dave Parkyn shares his story after getting a stroke aged just 28 years old
Last updated 12th Dec 2022
A man from Cornwall who suffered a severe stroke at aged 28 years old - after getting an infection - is encouraging other survivors to get mental health support.
Dave Parkyn, a carpenter from St Austell, told us the experience was difficult:
"If there's not many people to talk to, it is tough"
"At the very start, I didn't like to talk to many people about it because they wouldn't understand so therefore, I was just in my own head for a couple of years. I went through a drinking stage, and it was tough".
Dave got a splinter of wood caught in his hand while working in August 2020 - which led to bacterial meningitis.
As a result, he was left disabled - leaving him blind in one eye and half blind in the other.
He has now come forward to raise awareness, as the Stroke Association has launched counselling sessions for stroke survivors, to help them during their recovery.
Dave continued: "If you're locked in your own head, especially down in Cornwall it's quite a rural area, there's not really many services about.
"If there's not many people to talk to, it is tough. This service is definitely good".
Dave's mum, Jackie, has also used the service, saying she felt guilty when she didn't notice the signs.
Jackie told us: "In our heads, he came home from work with a headache. He ended up in hospital two days later. We thought it was a migraine, and we'd get a phone call, come and get him. We never expected a phone call to say he's seriously ill and might well die".
"It was a catastrophe"
Jackie explained that Dave's experienced in the height of COVID which made it more difficult to process:
"It was horrible, because he was unconscious, he was actually in a coma, we couldn't hold him, we couldn't hug him, we could simply hold his hand and talk to him.
"For Dave, for us, it's changed the whole family. But the counselling helped me to accept what had happened".
"I can't change it; I have to accept it"
In Cornwall, more than 1,000 people have a stroke each year and there are more than 14,000 people living with the effects of stroke.
The charity, Stroke Association, has found that three-quarters of stroke survivors experience mental health impacts following a stroke.
Jacqui Cuthbert, the charity’s associate director for the south west and Channel Islands, said the impact of stroke on mental health was huge.
She said: "Stroke survivors tell us that they and their families need support after they are discharged home and the enormity of what has happened hits them. Often this has severe consequences to their mental health and wellbeing.
"They feel frightened, anxious, confused and shocked. They worry about having another stroke and do not know who or where to turn to for help. This can slow recovery drastically after a stroke, bring on depression and even contribute to hospital readmission.
"Family members are catapulted into a role which no-one prepared them for and this can have enormous emotional repercussions. Around two thirds of carers have told us that the emotional impact of stroke was by far the most devastating to cope with".
Jacqui continued: "The rural nature of Cornwall means stroke survivors are far more at risk of isolation with significant consequences to their mental health and wellbeing.
"We will be helping stroke survivors get online to find out more about the effects of stroke, find out what’s available and chat with other survivors.
"One of our friendly, qualified, counsellors will talk through the challenges you’re facing, and identify what support you may need to help you rebuild life after stroke. We’ll work with you to help you come to terms with what’s happened to you.
"Our counsellors will tailor their support for your individual needs, focusing on issues such as loss and adjustment, relationships, understanding guilt and anger, and building confidence and self-esteem".
Stroke survivors in Cornwall can contact the service on 01872 301689 or find out more about getting emotional support on their website.