Beaconsfield mother speaks of 'traumatic' baby loss experience

A mother who experienced several baby losses speaks up about the trauma she went through.

Sarah Ainsworth during one of her pregnancies
Author: Zoe Head-ThomasPublished 13th Oct 2023

Sarah Ainsworth was 30 when she first lost a baby.

Followed another three losses in the space of five years.

"Back in 2015, my husband and I wanted to try for children, and a lot of my friends were having children so I was feeling the pressure", she said.

"I don't think I've ever ever been so low in my life..."

"I got to the three months and I had started to bleed, and I had a scan which showed I had a mis-miscarriage, where the pregnancy sack had kept on growing but there was no foetus inside."

After initially trying for a baby and losing four, Mrs Ainsworth realised quickly her losses must have had a medical explanation.

A number of tests later, doctors told her she had natural killer cells which attacked the foetuses.

"On the NHS you have to wait for three miscarriages before they support any follow-up or scans", she said.

"Obviously I was absolutely devastated and I had to have a surgery to remove what had grown and that was all so traumatising."

Mrs Ainsworth spoke of the isolation she felt from friends who were able to have children and started building families.

"...a huge impact on my mental health"

On top of that, at the time, her workplace showed little support, which eventually led her to quit her job.

During that time, the biggest impact her experience had on her life was how it impacted her mental health.

Mrs Ainsworth said: "My husband and I took a long time to get over that if I'm honest, and obviously I was very fearful about getting pregnant again."

"I don't think I've ever ever been so low in my life and it took a huge impact on my mental health"

Mrs Ainsworth started a blog to enable other women experiencing baby loss to share stories and concerns.

She now hopes more will be put in place to support women in the workplace who not only feel the effects of baby loss on their wellbeing, but are sometimes having to take time off work for surgeries, medical appointments, or therapy.