Calls for the equal treatment of LGBT families when registering births in Scotland

Published 17th Feb 2019

There are calls for the fairer treatment of LGBT families when registering the birth of a baby. It comes from a woman in Dennistoun who was left upset after her and her wife went to register their newborn at the local office.

30-year old Hanna Moy wrote and letter to officials after the experience. She said: ''I was so excited for the baby to be registered and to have our first ever family outing. That is, I was until the registrar asked 'which one of you is the mother?.' When they could plainly see that we are a family with two Mums.

''I found this deeply hurtful and cried a few tears. I Want us both to be seen as 'real' Mums. When I spoke with the council they said that this was the policy and they will continue to ask this same question of two mum families. I spoke to the Edinburgh office and they said that this is the policy across all of Scotland. I want to change the way that registrars speak to LGBT couples registering the birth of their child.''

Hanna went on: ''After speaking with the Edinburgh office, they basically said that if I could show that this wasn't just me and my isolated opinion but something the community actually wanted changed - and by the community they mean not only LGBT people but Scotland in general - they would be very happy to issue guidance to all the councils in Scotland about how all registrars should address and speak to LGBT people.''

''The form has 'mother' for the person who gave birth and 'father/parent' for the other parent. This can't really be changed without a massive legal battle and has been tested in court already many times. I'm not seeking to change this. I am asking that registrars be tactful while working around this language in order to best serve the needs of everyone.''

Hanna and her wife Sarah have two requests.

''When speaking to an LGBT couple consisting of two women, it would be best to avoid asking questions such as 'which one of you is the mother?' since for most of these families both women will identify as mothers.

''The relevant information needed is to know who gave birth to the child, in order that the correct name is filled in on the correct place on the form. It would be more tactful and appropriate to ask 'which one of you gave birth to the child?' or possibly 'which one of you is the gestational parent?' It is good to use 'gestational', referring to the person who carried the child, rather than 'biological' because of the complexities of IVF (a legal mother might carry a child she is not biologically the parent of.

''When speaking with a trans person who does not identify as female and who gave birth to the child, making sure to use the correct pronouns is very important. It is important to use 'he' if the legal mother identifies as male, though other pronouns such as 'they' may be more appropriate depending on the person. If a registrar uses the wrong pronoun and is corrected, it is best for the registrar to simply apologise and then use the correct pronoun from there. Instead of saying 'mother', it would be tactful to use a phrase like "gestational parent", which is still accurate and meets the legal definition of "mother" under the law but without causing unnecessary discomfort.''

''Also I would change the words on birth certificates from 'mother' to 'mother/gestational parent' and from 'father/parent' to 'father/non-gestational parent'.

Hanna shared her views on Facebook and was met with hundreds of messages of support. She has since started a petition calling for fairer treatment.