Lady Gaga Opens Up About Her Fight With Depression in 2013

Lady Gaga has opened up about a crippling bout of depression she suffered towards the end of 2013.

Mother Monster said she was “angry”, “cynical” and “exhausted with fighting people off” but eventually found strength at the turn of the year through her family, fans and music.

In the very candid interview with Harper’s Bazaar, Gaga said: "I became very depressed at the end of 2013. I was exhausted fighting people off. I couldn't even feel my own heartbeat. I was angry, cynical, and had this deep sadness like an anchor dragging everywhere I go.

"I just didn't feel like fighting anymore. I didn't feel like standing up for myself one more time - to one more person who lied to me."

Reflecting upon the turning point, the singer – real name Stefani Germanotta – added: "January 1st, I woke up, started crying again, and I looked in the mirror and said, 'I know you don't want to fight. I know you think you can't, but you've done this before. I know it hurts, but you won't survive this depression'.

"I really felt like I was dying - my light completely out. I said to myself, 'Whatever is left in there, even just one light molecule, you will find it and make it multiply. You have to for you. You have to for your music. You have to for your fans and your family'.

"Depression doesn't take away your talents - it just makes them harder to find. But I always find it. I learned that my sadness never destroyed what was great about me. You just have to go back to that greatness, find that one little light that's left. I'm lucky I found one little glimmer stored away."

She also opened up about how she has changed as a person since exploding onto the music scene in 2008.

"I'm also better at not letting people take advantage of me,” Gaga continued. “Five years ago, when I spotted someone with a hidden agenda, I allowed them to stay around me. I didn't want to believe it. I thought if I ignored it, then they would eventually see me again - that I'm a human being and not a doll. But it doesn't work that way."

"I speak up now. I realised that it's my own fault that people take advantage. I should be around people who cherish my talents, my health, my time. I'm not a pawn for anyone's future business. I'm an artist. I deserve better than to be loyal to people who only believe in me because I make money."

Lady Gaga plays four UK shows in this autumn as part of the ‘artRAVE: The ARTPOP Ball’ world tour. Catch her at the following dates:

OCTOBER 2014 Birmingham NIA – 15th Glasgow SEE Hydro – 19th Manchester Phones 4U Arena – 21st London O2 Arena – 23rd

Photo: Patrick Minnikin/Getty