Hugh Keevins: It's panto time!

It was great stuff for the radio. A fitting beginning to the panto season this festive period.

If Mark had just said he was going home to kick the cat and throw the dog out into the garden we'd have understood the depth of his emotion.

But, instead, a man who was at the end of his club's third meeting of this season with Celtic said he had no idea who assisted Rodgers in the most high profile, highly paid managerial duo in the history of Scottish football.

Oh, no, he didn't? Oh, yes, he did!

What was interesting amidst the slap-stick routine at Motherwell was the steely response from Rodgers to the allegations of conduct unbecoming a Celtic employee.

Rodgers used his denial of wrong doing to express his surprise at the way in which McGhee had comported himself in a manner "not befitting the assistant manager of Scotland."

It seemed to be the Celtic boss's way of saying, "If that's how a member of the national team's staff behaves then no wonder you're in the state you're in."

Not a man to be trifled with is Brendan if that's the kind of verbal stiletto he leaves between his opponents' shoulder blades.

Mark warburton, meanwhile, invoked another clause in the doolally contract after his team's defeat of Aberdeen at Ibrox.

That's the one which says, "No matter what happens, it was the media wot dun it."

Rangers' win was, apparently a direct hit on those who had written a "load of nonsense" in the immediate aftermath of the defeat from Hearts the previous Wednesday night.

Is this the same Warburton who went into the press room at Tynecastle and started the criticism by slating his own side's performance there?

The same manager who then dropped fifty per cent of his outfield players for the team's next match while offering proof of the extent to which he had been annoyed by what went on in Edinburgh?

How does this permit criticism of of the media who were only reflecting the views of an exasperated Rangers support?

However, when the doolally factor kicks in, the media has no option sometimes but to laugh at the antics of some of those around them.

On Superscoreboard on Saturday night, for example, Frank called in to say the occupants of the studio would need to wait for another day to celebrate a Celtic defeat. Frank had concluded that the studio was full of people who had sounded hurt by Tom Rogic's ninetieth minute winner at Motherwell.

This charge was, presumably, being levelled against our wonderful studio guest, Martin Compston, as well as the rest of us.

The same Martin who parted company with his chair and did a jig that would have got him on Strictly Come Dancing when the winning goal went in.

But here's the thing. Frank's call to allege anti-Celtic bias came at the end of a week which had begun with Colin calling in to claim he had heard the occupants of the studio cheering when Celtic had scored against Aberdeen in the League Cup final the previous weekend.

Cheering. Live on radio.

So, what's it to be? We were cheerleaders when Celtic won at Hampden and resembled pall bearers when Celtic won at Motherwell.

The doolally factor clearly involves hearing noises that never existed or incorporates the ability to read body language while listening to people on radio.

The bottom line is the Doolally Express has left the platform and will be arriving at a station near you in the not too distant future. And my guess is that station will be Maryhill on Friday night.

That's when we'll be accused of having a Partick Thistle banner in the Superscoreboard studio to show solidarity with Allan Archibald and his players as they prepare to face Celtic.

That'll be less than twenty-four hours before a listener swears he heard someone in the studio singing H-E-A-R-T-S before the start of their game against Rangers at Ibrox.

Still, I never forget that all of this is better than working for a living.