Quick fix or long goodbye?
The commonly used expression is, "You couldn't make it up."
But when it comes to Scottish football you don't have to make anything up. Crazy things happen spontaneously.
There we had Rangers on Saturday being given the chance to narrow the gap between themselves and Celtic at the top of the league to three points, thereby putting Brendan Rodgers' side under pressure to deliver the goods against the side they find more difficult than any other, Kilmarnock, twenty-four hours later.
But Rangers could not re-arrange the following words into a coherent sentence, horse, don't, gift, look, a mouth, in, the.
Fast forward to Rugby Park and the pitch that resembles a slab of concrete with lines on it and Celtic deliver one of the most pedestrian performances of the season.
However, as per the SPFL Premiership script, the match ends with two players correctly sent off, flares being let off and a coin being disgracefully propelled in the direction of Kris Boyd for the crime of being a former Rangers player.
That and a belated winner from Celtic's captain which ought, under logical circumstances, to have put a down payment on an eighth title in a row for his club.
"You couldn't make it up?"
It couldn't happen more often, more like.
Now for the next instalment.
Rangers' manager, Steven Gerrard, could not have been any more honest or candid than he was in the wake of the damaging draw against St. Johnstone on Saturday.
He slapped his players down for the poor quality of their play, their lack of leadership and the absence of bravery in the line of fire.
Now he has to hope his abrasive words have the desired effect when Rangers meet Kilmarnock in their Scottish Cup replay at Ibrox on Wednesday night.
Some might interpret Gerrard's words as throwing his players under the proverbial bus while not taking his share of the blame, but I thought it was accepted that a manager is unable to influence his players' performance once they cross the white line to start a game?
The bottom line is Rangers dare not lose to Kilmarnock or the likelihood is their season is over in February, an unthinkable state of affairs.
Gerrard has said Rangers can forget about the title this season, and that is after considerable financial investment in the playing squad.
Out of everything before the end of February would create a crisis of confidence.
Meanwhile, Celtic should concentrate on a damage limitation exercise when they play the return leg of their Europa League tie with Valencia on Thursday night.
Celtic will not recover a two goal deficit in Spain and anyone who thinks they will is a well-meaning fantasist.
Brendan Rodgers was venturing the opinion that his players weren't up to it beyond a certain level in Europe at the same time as Gerrard was offering the opinion that Rangers weren't up to it at the highest level of domestic competition in Scotland.
Rodgers, like Gerrard, is not blameless when it comes to this state of affairs. They are flesh and blood and unable to claim infallibility.
They make selection errors and tactical mistakes. And both of them now need help.
If Rangers win nothing this season then the manager will need even greater financial assistance to combat Celtic. If it is not forthcoming then he is wasting his time and endangering his future in the managerial business unless he goes somewhere else.
If Celtic win a treble treble it'll be the cause of street parties but Rodgers will know European failure is harming his reputation on a wider scale and he will be better off going somewhere else.
Unless the club's hierarchy decide they have the ambition to advance Celtic on the European stage as well as the domestic front and give the manager the tools he needs to work with at European level.
If neither club is willing to back their manager then we might see this as the beginning of the long goodbye for Rodgers and Gerrard.
You couldn't make it up. It'll be spontaneous combustion.