Gone for a Burton
The tastiest quote of recent days came from Nigel Clough, the Burton Albion manager, after his team had been on the receiving end of a nine goal mauling from Manchester City in the first leg of their League Cup semi-final.
Clough's post-match television interrogator earnestly asked him, "When did you start to think it could get messy?"
Nigel, showing a flair for the killer one-liner that could only have been inherited from his dad, the legendary Brian, came back as quick as a flash.
"When the draw was made."
Absolutely accurate and precisely the way Gary Bollan, Cowdenbeath's manager, and his counterpart at Airdrie, Ian Murray, should be feeling as they prepare to face Rangers and Celtic respectively in the Scottish Cup this weekend.
Cup cock-ups have periodically been part of Celtic's history, and Rangers', and all of them entirely their own fault.
Rangers' older fans are still haunted by the memory of their cup exit at the hands of Berwick Rangers in 1967, and then there was the unthinkable sight of John Lambie's Hamilton Accies beating a Graeme Souness-led Rangers at Ibrox twenty years later.
Celtic once managed to beat Liverpool at Anfield in the UEFA Cup before Martin O'Neill made so many changes he couldn't remember the exact number and went out of the cup at Inverness the following week.
And who can ever forget the night Caley went ballistic and Celtic were atrocious in Glasgow following another display of carelessness?
Certainly not John Barnes, who was fired a couple of days later.
That was almost as bad as a Celtic side featuring Roy Keane going out of the cup to Clyde at Broadwood.
I could go on, but you get my drift.
Cowdenbeath, currently sitting a distinctly un-threatening fifth in League Two, and Airdrie, a less than menacing fifth in League One are the definition of lower league mediocrity.
They should feel the full power behind the gulf in ability that undoubtedly exists between them and their next opponents.
A nine goal margin of victory shouldn't be thought out of the question for either Rangers or Celtic, or even both, at the weekend.
And such results would summon up a solid state of mind for the resumption of league championship hostilities the following midweek.
The warm weather training camps in foreign parts are over.
More importantly, the Russian Roulette stage of the title race has been reached, with Celtic and Rangers tied on the same number of points while the defending champions have a game in hand.
One false move, one misdirected bullet to the foot, and you've had it.
And the consequences of misfiring will be severe.
The Rangers fans in the main - it is no longer an optimistic minority - believe the league title could be ripped from Celtic's hands.
Failure to do so will be forgiven, but if Celtic do hit Eight in a Row then the pressure on Steven Gerrard will be ratcheted up next season for reasons which need absolutely no explaining.
The circumstances surrounding Brendan Rodgers are equally self-explanatory.
Failure to win Eight in a Row, and the subsequent end of the Ten in a Row dream, will be an unmitigated disaster for a Celtic support who have spent years taunting the fans of their oldest rivals with the arrival of that history-making achievement.
It would inevitably lead to the greatest shake-up behind the scenes at the club since Fergus McCann took control of Celtic a quarter of a century ago.
There you have it then. No pressure, Brendan. Win the title or the lid comes off the club.
And the start of the no holds barred phase of the season begins with Airdrie's visit to Celtic Park on Saturday night.
The treble treble, one third of the way towards fruition after the League Cup final win over Aberdeen, is at stake against what should be the proverbial lambs to the slaughter.
Experimental team selection and unfathomable team formation, a sometimes feature of this season for Celtic, is not what is required.
Airdrie, like Cowdenbeath the night before, should get the Burton, the whole Burton and nothing but the Burton, so help me God.
There are eyes now burning on the back of your head, Brendan and Steven.
When did you get the feeling it was starting to get this way?
On the day you agreed to come and work in the city where tolerance, patience and sympathy are simply not available to you if you make a serious mistake.